|
|
|
Dealing With An Unexpected
Death
|
 |
| As hard as it
is to cope with the death of a loved one, it is even harder when you
loose them to violence or an accident. In the aftermath of a tragedy
like this, many people find themselves harboring a lingering bitterness
towards society and life in general. Although these wounds are not
quick to heal, the love and support of family and friends can help
someone accept their loss and put their life back together. |
|
As a friend, you may find yourself comforting someone
close to you through an experience like this. Victor Parachin, author
of Grief Relief, offers some suggestions on how to comfort a grieving
family member or friend during this difficult period.
- Be available to help, even with everyday tasks.
Offer to help take care of the pets or to pick up the kids from
school.
- Don't judge what a grieving person may say. They
are in pain and don't always mean what they say. Allow them to
express all their feelings.
- Be sensitive and respectful. Don't trivialize
their pain or try to comfort them with cliches like "It was God's
will."
- Most of all - be patient. People who must suffer
through a murder trial or other reminders of a death may need
more time to heal.
|
 |
|
| What
To Do If It Happens To You |
| Unfortunately,
there may be times when you will experience an unexpected death of
someone close to you. In her book, "No Time For Goodbyes",
author Jannis Harris Lord, outlines what she considers the keys to
coping with this sort of tragedy: |
- Don't be afraid to express your feelings. Keeping
everything locked up inside will only make it worse.
- Be aware that there is no "right way" to mourn.
Allow others to grieve a mutual loss in their own way.
- Gather information about the death through police
reports, autopsy reports and eyewitness information. This information
can help bring you peace of mind.
- Don't be afraid to recover. You did not die along
with your loved one, and they would not want you to grieve forever.
|
| Chasing
The Blues Away |
| Feelings of sadness and depression always follow
the loss of someone you love. Here are some natural techniques the
bereaved can use to ease the blues: |
- Use
hope to cope. Hope is a vigorous
principle - keep a positive frame of mind and avoid fatalistic
thoughts. Remind yourself that you are really in control and you
can do something about your situation.
- Confide
in a friend.
Share time with a trusted friend. Sharing your fears or your sadness
over the loss of a loved one can relieve you of much of that stress
and anxiety.
- Tap
into the spiritual.
Tapping into a faith community is good medicine and
has positive effects on patients dealing with everything from
depression to cancer and heart disease. A faith community is also
a valuable source for strong reliable friendships.
- Exercise.
Physical activity produces endorphins, the body's natural chemicals
that relieve pain and create a better mood. The physical activity
doesn't have to be strenuous. A good walk is enough to combat
a bad mood.
- Write
them off. Relief
from the blues can be effectively accomplished by the simple task
of keeping a journal or diary. Research reveals that writing out
feelings greatly reduces stress.
- Intentionally cultivate
more joy.
To cultivate joy, shift your awareness to the positive and modify
the negative. You can't avoid negative events, but you don't have
to dwell on them.
- Socialize.
One of the biggest mistakes we make when feeling blue is to isolate
ourselves, which can make a bad mood worse. Force yourself to
call somebody or have a simple party and invite friends you haven't
seen in a while.
- Accept life's disappointments.
Rather than letting discouraging and disheartening events
frustrate you, simply accept the inevitable fact that such experiences
are simply the price of being alive.
|
Memories Of A Lifetime Funeral Home®
21 Market Square • Manheim, PA 17545
PH (717) 665-4341 • FX (717) 665-9602
Copyright © 2005 Buch Funeral Home, Inc. All Rights Reserved. |
|
